Chain of Command

The store I currently work at is owned by a husband and wife. One of my co-workers (Tofutti Cutie calls her "H-Man") once referred to our store as "a Mom and pop store: They're the mom and pop; we're the kids."

That's true, but I tend to think of it more as a chain of command. I'm sure someone who knows more about military hierarchy than me (*cough cough* Jack, Pedicularis *cough cough*) can critique my set-up, but here's my "chain of command":

Husband-owner: General. Everyone jumps when he comes in the room. He gives orders that everyone obeys -- no matter how dumb we think they are. He understands very little about what goes on in the day to day operations and we like it when he stays out of our way.

Wife-owner: Major. Understands more about what's going on and is more involved in store operations, but still is removed from daily stuff. More friendly and approachable than the General.

H-Man: Lieutenant. Primary recipient of orders from above. Primary giver of orders to underlings. Makes most major daily decisions.

Tofutti Cutie and me (mamurd): Sergeants. Pass on orders from Lieutenant. Make minor decisions. Operate relatively independently.

everyone else: Privates. Make very few decisions on their own.


In times of a crisis (i.e. the month between Thanksgiving and Christmas), the General and the Major start getting more involved. They start passing out weird orders to the Lieutenant and second-guessing her decisions. This makes her crazy. She passes on the orders (and craziness) to her sergeants, who in turn pass it on to the privates.

Those poor privates...